Some Things Do Not Remain the Same

by Anita Menon

I have this very sweet friend. An incidental friend you may call him. When I met him first, I had a huge crush on him but he happened to my friend’s boyfriend so I let it be. Never believed in encroaching somebody else’s territory. He still remained a good-to-talk-to friend. When we moved away from each other to different cities, we remained in touch through emails. After series of break-ups and link-ups, we still happened to be good friends, narrating to each other our trials and tribulations. But it had been good seven years that we had actually spoken to each other. In our minds, we had the same image of the girl/boy we left back in the city we had first met. He was the very handsome, very charming, very smart, boy-next-door and that is the picture I still carried in my head. I am pretty sure, he does the same thing about me. So in all these years, he always occupied a little bit of my mind space unconsciously.

The came by birthday and I recieved a call from him.  His voice seemed so different from the one I remember. I felt uncomfortable like I was talking to a stranger at the other end.  Nothing seemed familiar and I felt a similar hesitation from the other end. None of it felt right , like  it did in my head. Conversation which started at the peak of excitement went from slow to drab and we quickly disconnected with some excuses. I still could not figure out what felt so wrong and somehow it felt like he too experienced the same with me. Voices, I feel, have a great deal, to do with how much we can connect to the person. A familiar voice makes a huge difference to our emotions and when we hear a very different voice vis-a-vis the expected, it comes as a rude shock. I do not know how many would have experienced the same, as I did. Its been two days after my birthday and I have come to realize  he occupies next to zero mind space now. Was that phone call for good, I do not know or will I miss that friendship,I don’t know that either.