A Mother’s Intuition
by Anita Menon
I never thought I would write about this but I was compelled to. It has happened too many times to ignore it. When somebody starts about mother-child bond, I always found it too bollywood-ish to deal with (this was before I had Mimi). Usually I am kind and listen to it all but passively. The other times, I simply have no patience for such cock and bull stories. I recall the times when my mum strictly warned me about doing something and I would never listen to her. It always ended badly. I attributed that ability of hers, to her experience in life and all that concerns it. Ofcourse, I know that she always has my best interests in mind and perhaps at that moment it may not look like it. Away from home as a student and then as a working professional, I began to really see that her ability had transcended geographies. There were times when she called me in the middle of the night to know how am doing and that used to be time when I was terribly sick. It used to freak me out since I would have deliberately kept this from her since I would not have liked her getting upset. But how in the world did she manage to do it? It comforted and shocked me at the same time. I kept reasoning it as being a lucky guess. She claims that she just knows since I am her child.
Fast forward and now I am a mum. I feel like a novice even after 22 months of handling my child. I feel like everyday she throws something new at me that catches me off guard. I am not a natural at it like my mum or many of you, I must confess. But things have happened where I have started to feel that a mother-child bond is more than just about experience. Sure, I know Mimi better than I knew her 10 or 12 months back. I know her general pattern of behaviour but she is growing every second in every possible way. That makes it important for me to unlearn and then relearn all over again. To cut the chase, I am writing this post merely to solicit advice and comfort out of knowing that it does happen to others also. I have to know and its important to me and that is the reason why am writing this post at 5 am in the morning inspite of having slept only at 2 a.m.
Mimi has this habit of sleeping only at the edge of the bed. Yes, she still sleeps with us in our bed. She has a cot of her own, but she wouldn’t prefer sleeping there. Sometimes I feel, it is more for my comfort that I let her do so. Usually she is fine. Well almost always she fine. But today, early morning at 4:30 a.m I dreamt that she was about to fall. In a matter of seconds I leaned down at the foot of our bed, to pick her up even before she touched the ground. I still hadn’t opened my eyes when I held her close to ease my racing heart. She got miffed by the little disturbance but soon fell asleep. I couldn’t get a wink after that. So I decided to do this post. This has happened so many times before and I kept attributing this to reflex but don’t you have to be awake for your reflexes to be active? I usually get these sights about her when I am asleep and see it very clearly even before it has happened. My nerves refuse to rest after that. These dreams/sights are usually concerning her safety and overall well-being.
This morning, I decided to google about this and found numerous stories and certain grave ones too- ones that became a matter of life and death. A mother’s intuition saving her children’s lives. Extraordinary indeed!! Research suggests that a mother’s top 5 anxieties are all children-related and these dreams stem from these anxieties. I have also come to believe that Mothers have an incredible radar when it comes to her children. Even in those rare occasions that I am away from her I am constantly thinking about her. I begin to feel disturbed if something unpleasant has happened when I am away.
So that’s my story about my bond with my daughter. I would want to know stories about similar experiences, if you may care to share.